This was perhaps the best thing that could have happened to us- a reality check. This post had started completely different. We felt that we did really good last year especially with our clothing and heeling purchases. Guess what that didn’t happen.
When we started working I was very much interested in getting myself a shoe collection to rival Carrie and a decent set of clothes to go along with my clothes. I did manage to deck out way better than I do today. Washing clothes was a big chore without a washing machine so before I outsourced the chore I would rather buy a few pairs than wash stuff. I had left home with a suitcase and the day and the day I shifted to our first married homes I had a huge taxi full of stuff. This was after I had thrown away quite a bit of stuff.
Once we moved to Hyderabad being married caught up to us and as we started to travel more buying clothes seemed like less of a priority. This does not mean we never bought clothes, far from it. This was around the time when online market places has risen their cheap heads and we enjoyed shopping form our bed quite a bit.
However both of us were under the impression that last year we had been good kids who did not waste a lot of cash on clothing various parts of our body. Oh how wrong we were. Once we sat down to count clothes and shoes bought we came to following total
1 pair of shoes
1 piece of ethnic wear
Total- 4 items
2 pieces of ethnic wear
1 pair of shoes
Total – 8 items
It might not sound that bad with just 12 items bought under various heads, but it is way more than I was under the impression we bought last year.
The Bottoms Problem
The worst part is both the jeans I bought just didn’t work and gave up due to my perfect (absent) thigh gap and I am in the market form some new ones. The pairs of shoes we bought are working great for both of us especially in rains. The pouring ruined my comfy leather shoes before we invested in crocs. The ethnic wear was for a close friend’s wedding and since we don’t wear or use them often older ones didn’t fit or were missing a component or two.
You know what I did above? This is something we have both been doing a lot lately and most of us can easily be accused of. I am making excuses. A lot of above are real facts and situation which needed some expense at that time but not all of them.
Fighting my own excuses
When the jeans gave away around December I was left in a lurch with just one pair of trousers to go with everything I wear to office. Around this time we were on a drive to save maximum amount we could and we were both feeling we can do better. I did not run out to buy another pair right away. Instead thanks to some health related changes and some weird coincidence I has lost a good amount of weight which meant a few older clothes started fitting again. As I write this I am wearing a top I bought way back in 2012 and hadn’t worn in last at least 2 years.
I also started to wear whatever kurta pajama fit me, to office. These usually require ironing two things instead of one in the morning and there are no pockets,so I hardly wear these.
But this time I was not making excuses and had decided to postpone any purchases off to next FY (our office subsidizes office wear for a certain amount each FY).
I now plan to go through my closet once more, purge things which have un-mendable holes or stains and things which I can’t fit into. Next step is to mend things which can be mended and then decide if I am really running low on clothes.
In last few weeks I was gifted a considerable sum as gift cards for a big chain. I can use it to buy clothes for free or I can buy stuff I think I need for my house (which is probably just want) or I can give it to someone as a gift or exchange it for cash with someone who is going to shop there anyway. To be true I was not considering any of these options a week back. Till then we were martyrs who hadn’t bought anything in one full year.
This does not mean that there are no clothing purchases in near future especially if I keep on losing the huge amount of excess weight I have on me right now.
This is not just about our clothes. This feeling of martyrdom and complacency extend to more areas of our life like eating out and cooking. I have been feeling like shit and the job has suddenly become quite tiring of late. We work half days on Saturdays which means only one day to sleep in. this means none of us is really in the cooking mood especially for something to carry to lunch. We have spent a small fortune on eating out in past few months.
I am someone who strongly believes in not killing oneself for every tiny penny and some days did drain us so much that we could barely eat takeout before we crashed. This is not true for a lot of days though, days when we have been busy watching something online or playing one game or another.
It extends beyond clothes
Eating out is one of the biggest drains on our income and has definitely affected our savings rate. We both love food and it is really difficult to not feel like you deserve a relaxed evening when you have been working your ass off for over 10 hours. It is also equally stupid to define every indulgence as I deserve it because I did that.
If we look deeper I am sure we can find other things where excuses have crept up on us. Thankfully we are not making excuses like ‘… it is expected of us to do …’. To be fair we have succumbed to multiple such lines from our parents which drive us nuts. Thankfully we are not making these excuses to ourselves.
It is such a weird thing, life catches up to you and you miss a step without realizing what has happened. Last night was another such realization. I haven’t been at the top of my health lately and it has become a constant source of stress for me. Last night however I had to cook and finish off the perishable food we have in the fridge before we leave for a vacation. Suddenly it did not feel as difficult as it had been previous weeks, once I started.
Have you ever been under a strong belief about yourself or your belongings and have been proven wrong?